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Post by Mr Bismarck's Electric Donkey on Jun 7, 2009 18:24:56 GMT
FEBRUARY 2006Game of the MonthLatina were putting together a solid month of performances with a win at home and an away draw when Potenza came to play at the Domenico Francioni. Cat Stevens is still banned, so we start with original Latina's up front in the shape of Gennaro Marasco and Enea Parma, while Ronnie Barker would continue on the left, even with the return of AML Domenico Costanzo from injury. Latina were fast out of the traps with a couple of efforts on goal within the first two minutes and Potenza's defence cracked very early in the ninth minute when Enea Parma picked up a speculative chip over the top and cracked in a shot that Potenza's keeper turned away into the path of Gennaro Marasco who scored probably his easiest goal of the season so far. There was 08:22 on the clock and already we had five shots. For the next 20 minutes we continue to exert control on the game, looking to double our lead when Potenza clear a corner and Sue Pollard fails to close down quickly enough, allowing Stefano Morello to score with Potenza's first shot of the game. At the half I ignored the chance to sympathise with the team for the GLitFOS and stuck the boot in instead, telling Enea Parma I was unhappy with him and then sending him to the bench in favour of Gerard Depardieu. If anything we start the second half even faster than the first as Marasco sees a fingertip save deny him a second and Depardieu bangs a header against the post from the corner. just seven minutes into the half Marasco is away again, plays a one-two with Depardieu that puts him clean through, sprints in on goal and then, at the last minutes, rolls a square ball across the box for David McCallum to sidefoot home. Potenza change their shape quickly to try to chase the game, but this leaves them wide open for the counter attack and on 59 minutes Russell Harty put the cap on a man-of-the-match performance as he picked up a ball on the right, outran one defender, dribbled past a second and sent in a low angled pass that Marasco side footed home first time at the far post. Latina 3-1 PotenzaThe RestLatina 2-0 Vigor Lamezia Rieti 1-1 Latina Latina 3-1 Potenza Igea Virtus 2-2 Latina Player of the MonthMidfielder David McCallum put in 7-8-8-8, two goals and an assist for a very solid month as part of the coming out party his 2006 is turning into. The RestNew boy Russell Harty didn't find the net but did muster two assists and a man of the match performance against Potenza. New Scottish Centre Half Midge Ure didn't start his Latina career too well, with a 6-6-7 in three appearances off the bench, but he did get called up for the Scottish Under 19 side. InIn the Club... - Hornet's favourite bald, former Sampdoria striker Gianluca Vialla is the new man in the big chair at Serie A strugglers Lecce, who fired former manager Roberto "Rat" Rizzo. In the Money... - The board of directors at Latina stepped up again, stumping up another €220,000 to push the club's debt back under €500,000. With Latina still in with a chance of promotion the board are somewhat forced to open their moth-filled wallets as they don't want to start next season with a points-penalty for going into receivership. OutOut on his ear... - Along with Lecce, Serie A's Atalanta ran out of patience with Stefano Colantuono, while Andria Bat become the first Serie C team to show signs of pushing their boss out as they slump down to 12th in C2/C.
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Post by Sonic on Jun 8, 2009 7:28:28 GMT
We win 3-0 and the peace-loving Cat Stevens gets a goal, an assist, a red card, the man of the match award and a three match ban. I bet he's the on singing the teams song after the games too! This seasons turning into a decent affair in the end, even with the swearometer being given a work out.
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Post by Moo on Jun 8, 2009 8:38:39 GMT
Fantastic update, s1ut and a great set of results too. Lurking very nicely indeed, I notice.
:thumb:
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Post by coffers on Jun 8, 2009 10:03:12 GMT
Very nice indeed.
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Post by Mr Bismarck's Electric Donkey on Jun 8, 2009 13:54:53 GMT
Aye, it's suddenly going rather well. With almost no one capable of scoring a goal in the first half of the season I really concentrated on shoring up the defence and trying to nick 1-0s every week. Now we have a couple of options up front and some goals and more creativity from the midfield too, we look a bit dangerous.
Both Cat Stevens and Depardieu are good in the air, so away I can go defensive with those two up front and just punt the ball clear and then at home I can swap one out for Marasco who has really rounded into form once the players around him improved.
If I can avoid injuries to my starting central defence; Steve Jobs and Sue Pollard and avoid my board selling someone out from under me to service our debt, I might have a sneaky run at the playoffs.
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Post by Moo on Jun 8, 2009 14:05:45 GMT
An interesting nicknaming policy you have though, actually using real names of non-footballers. When do you use Nicky Butt?
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Post by Mr Bismarck's Electric Donkey on Jun 8, 2009 14:22:40 GMT
Something that started when in another FM game I nicknamed my 5'9" keeper with terrible handling "Jeremy Beadle."
Seeing the commentary tell me Fern Britton outpaced someone down the line and crossed for Jimmy Kranky to head home made me chuckle a little more than it should, so I stuck with the idea when I decided to nickname here.
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Post by Moo on Jun 9, 2009 9:35:11 GMT
Dale Winton with a crunching tackle might be a bit harrowing for someone though.
Beyonce sniffing around the box....
I dunno, just putting some images out there....
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Post by Sonic on Jun 10, 2009 8:10:42 GMT
Kylie headed the ball on...
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Post by Moo on Jun 10, 2009 9:21:27 GMT
Ron Jeremy bends one from 20 yards!
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Post by coffers on Jun 10, 2009 9:25:05 GMT
Julian Clarey squeezed one in from a tight angle,might be even more harrowing.
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Post by Mr Bismarck's Electric Donkey on Jun 10, 2009 14:02:15 GMT
MARCH 2006
Game of the Month It was genuinely difficult to pick the best game from March and, for about the first time, that difficulty was not because there were no good games to choose from. The nod goes to our game in in the Stadio Della Catina away to Modica on March 19.
We’d opened the month with a 4-0 thrashing of Giugliano at home thanks to goals from David McCallum, Cat Stevens on his return to the score sheet after suspension and a brace from the still yet to be nicknamed Gennaro Marasco.
Marasco had hobbled off at the end of that game however and so the focus would turn to our bohemian front pair of Stevens and Depardieu for the rest of the month.
Ten minutes into the Modica game it wasn’t the front that was worrying me, it was the back, as our defence had given away a penalty, which thankfully was missed, and then stood around watching as the home side had strolled through our penalty area to take a 1-0 lead. Shortly after Steve Jobs picked up the yellow card that would see him get a two match ban for collecting enough of the cards to wallpaper his house.
This travesty of justice toward the CEO of Apple was too much for Cat Stevens and for the next hour the worst place in the world to be was between the Moidica goal and our enraged folk singer.
The first of what would turn out to be his four goals was a subtle effort, spanked in off the woodwork from about 35 yards so hard the keeper didn’t even move. By halftime, Stevens had made it 2-1 to Latina as he picked up the trash from a corner and tapped in from six yards.
I pat the boys on the back at halftime, send them back out and before I’ve got back to my seat Stevens has dribbled around the entire home team and all of their subs, twice and rolled the ball into the empty net for 3-1. On 60 minutes it’s Cat Stevens 4, Modica 1 as he sees his header from 15 yards parried, smacks the rebound against the post and then tonks the rebound’s rebound into the far corner.
The commentator says “Cat Stevens has been an assassin today”, which sounds like something Matthew Kelley would say on a bizarre celebrity version of Stars in Their eyes.
A week later Stevens gets a hattrick as we crush Nocerina 4-0.
Modica 1-4 Latina
The Rest Latina 4-0 Giugliano Modica 1-4 Latina Andira Bat 1-1 Latina Latina 4-0 Nocerina Galipoli 1-0 Latina
A couple of non-wins in there, including the loss to second-placed Galipoli, which is only fair I suppose, as we beat them at their place when they were top and we were rubbish.
Player of the Month Cat Stevens, you’ll not be at all surprised to hear. For 97 goals and three kittens saved from trees.
The Rest Despite Stevens’ fantasticness, Russell Harty won the most man of the match awards for the month, because he touched the ball at some point along Stevens’ route to goal and was credited with an assist.
Laugh at the big Clubs Man United lost the cup no one cares about final 1-0 to Aston Villa, while Liverpool were dumped out of the FA Cup fifth round at Anfield, by Norwich.
Cisse missed an 89th minute penalty in that one. :humb:
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Post by Sonic on Jun 11, 2009 8:36:55 GMT
Cat Stevens has been a little bit of alright this month hasn't he? My favourite was definitely his crazy fourth goal Not a bad month either considering how you started out. It's looking like it's going to be an interesting end to the season at that too. KUTGW
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Post by Mr Bismarck's Electric Donkey on Jun 11, 2009 13:31:15 GMT
"Interesting", aye. I've been waiting for the slump™ for a while now and it appears the AI got tired of waiting, as it just knacked Stevens, Marasco and both my starting wingers. As my current tactic is "get the ball wide and lump it into the middle from anywhere for Stevens to make a mess" these injuries neuter me somewhat. Depardieu is tall too, but doesn't have the ratings on the mental side of the game that Stevens has so often isn't lumbering into the right spot, so I've been using him as a late game battering ram rather than for 90 mintues and neither of my backup wingers (who are both converted fullbacks), have a crossing rating above 4. So my current tactics are for my wingers to accidentally cross it to the point where Depardieu is accidentally standing.
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Post by Moo on Jun 11, 2009 14:47:15 GMT
Sounds plausible enough for it to work. KUTGW! :thumb:
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Post by Sonic on Jun 12, 2009 10:27:59 GMT
FM likes to do that with the injuries doesn't it. I think your on to a winner with your back up plan.
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Post by Mr Bismarck's Electric Donkey on Jun 12, 2009 13:30:41 GMT
APRIL 2006
Game of the Month April was a peculiar month as injuries forced us to put together a rag, tag and bobbins side featuring, at times, a wounded goalkeeper on from the start, a youth team centre half, and fullbacks on the wings, but even without a completely fit side we still looked like a team that could cause some trouble.
The team most troubled by us this month was league leaders Vittoria who came to the Domenico Francioni on the back of an 11 game unbeaten run and look set to make it twelve as Bruno Carieri puts the visitors one-up on 15 minutes.
Goalkeeper Federico Orlandini picks up a knock during the goal, but reserve keeper Davide Accialini is already out injured, so Orlandini will have to soldier on.
Vittoria are way too good for us down the flanks, so even though we need a goal we have four fullbacks on the field so I may as well use them. I try to clamp down on the wings and change our focus to the middle, giving David McCallum more freedom from MC and dropping Edoardo Artistico into the hole behind Depardieu.
The team seem to take a while to settle into this, but the good news is that we seem to be cutting off the supply of crosses into the middle, where our injured keeper has been flapping at everything.
I'm focused on getting us to the half still only one goal behind when a Vittoria attack breaks down on our 18 yard line, Steve Jobs lobs the ball up toward halfway where Artistico controls it, turns and plays a one-two with Depardieu that sets Artistico away one-on-one with the keeper, who he rounds to slot in the equaliser about three seconds before half time.
Despite the scoreline we've been comprehensively outplayed to this point so I tell the players I'm disappointed with them and kick them back out.
What we get in the second half is effectively a fist fight and both teams finish with eleven players only by grace of a lenient referee as there are 29 fouls in the second 45 minutes. The goods news is that while we're not as good as Vittoria at football, apparently we are a bit tasty in a fight and the visitors slowly shrink away from challenges and the game begins to tip in our favour.
On 70 minutes the physical stuff finally pays off for us with a goal as Ronnie Barker wins a sliding tackle on the left, knocks the ball out of his feet and bends over a long diagonal cross which plonks right on Gerard Depardieu's head and the mahoosive Frenchman cracks the header across the keeper and in at the far post.
I expected Vittoria to come out looking for an equaliser, but they don't seem to like it up 'em and instead they stay in their shell until the 85th minute when they finally change "to a more attacking formation", just in time to allow Depardieu away to grab his second.
Latina 3-1 Vittoria
The Rest Rende 2-1 Latina Latina 3-1 Vittoria Latina 3-1 Pro Vasto Melfi 3-1 Latina
The Melfi defeat was especially annoying as I'd attempted to fire my team up by saying we'd put a dent in their season and their promotion hopes and then my team just weren't at the races and even though Cat Stevens scored on his return from injury, that defeat leaves us without the chance to gain auto-promotion.
Player of the Month Left back Ronnie Barker is a surprise winner with 6-9-9-7 through the month, three assists and a MotM award, despite playing out of position on the left wing to cover for the injured Domenico Costanzo.
The Rest Old man river Edoardo Artistico is a surprise as he comes into the side to cover for the injured Cat Stevens, Gennarro Marasco and Enea Parma and ends up with two goals and 7-9-8 rating in three games.
On the downside, usually solid centre half Steve Jobs rates 7-8-5-6 - a very ugly month for him, dragging his season average down to 7.11. The five comes when usual partner-in-crime Sue Pollard has a knock and he's forced to play alongside a youther, but we want more performance from him in those instances, not less.
All Change Lots of shuffling in the big chairs around Europe as Rafa Benetiz leaves Liverpool to take over at Real Madrid and a week later Barca fire Frank Rijkaard and install Michael Laudrup as their new boss.
Liverpool then grab Real Betis boss Lorenzo Ferrer, so that they can continue buying all Spaniards.
The Big Pots Chelsea let in a 71st minute penalty in the LAC semis that dumps them out 4-4 on away goals and sends Bayern to the final to meet Arsenal.
In England, Man United win the pot with three games to spare, while Birmingham and Bolton are down. Man City need a last day miracle to stay up.
In Spain Sevilla are top with two to play, but can still be caught by Madrid and Valencia.
Seria A has gone to Milan at a canter, with Treviso, Empoli and Cagliari through the trap door. [/quote]
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Post by Moo on Jun 12, 2009 14:12:19 GMT
Mixed bag for sure there, fella. Shame about the auto-promote, but we're still in line for a playoff spot, right? [/response]
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Post by Mr Bismarck's Electric Donkey on Jun 12, 2009 14:19:44 GMT
It's still possible for me to finish out of the playoffs, but it'll take a combination of results on the last day and I have goal difference on everyone, so I feel pretty secure. My last game is home to Marcianase who are 12th and could get sucked into the relegation zone, but hopefully they're not up for a fight.
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Post by Mr Bismarck's Electric Donkey on Jun 13, 2009 11:29:22 GMT
MAY 2006
Massacre of the Month It's the final game of the season between a team that needs a draw to definitely make the playoffs and a team that needs a draw to definitely avoid relegation.
So that'll be a friendly game played at a low pace, ending in a 0-0, right?
Surprisingly, no. What actually happens is a mugging where we win 2-1 thanks to goals from Edoardo Artistico and Russell Harty, but ended up with more injuries than points as our visitors kick Harty, Cat Stevens, Gerard Depardieu, defenders Marco Candrina and Sue Pollard and midfielder David McCallum out of the game.
All six end up with injuries that will keep them wounded for a few days "to two weeks" which just happens to be when the first playoff game is.
In the second half of the game with Marcianase I tire of the ref just being a myopic prat with a whistle and put all of my players on hard tackling and the end of the game is spicy, to say the least.
"Amusingly" a game with eight injuries, (we lose that game 6-2), has only 36 fouls called and no yellows.
Latina 2-1 Real Marcianase Artistico - 38 Harty - 45 Molino - 48
Amusingly, Vittoria lose on the last day of the year, allowing Melfi to leapfrog them and take the league title and auto-promotion.
What's left of our team will face Gallipoli over two legs in the playoff semi-final.
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Post by Mr Bismarck's Electric Donkey on Jun 13, 2009 12:26:33 GMT
MAY 2006PLAYOFFS - FIRST LEGThe first game of the playoffs is upon us before most of the players injured in the final game of the season return to fitness, so the eleven we send out looks like this : GK - Orlandi DR - CappezottoDL - Anania DC - Steve Jobs DC - Midge UreMR - AzzarelliML - Ronnie BarkerMC - Manoni MC - McCallum FC - Cat Stevens FC - ParmaThe grey ones wouldn't normally be starters and, amusingly, for the second leg Midge Ure will be away with the Scottish U21s meaning unless Pollard limps back in we'll have a youther starting in the away leg. :humb: With this slightly wonky team out I decided to clamp down at home and try to hold out for a 0-0, with the hope of getting some more players back for the second leg and sneaking an away goal. That plan lasts for nine minutes before Cat Stevens dribbles around two defenders and sticks the ball away into the corner for an early lead. Stevens had returned from injury on the morning of the game, so with an hour gone I take him off in favour of his giant French counterpart. Depardieu, who returned from injury yesterday, has an immediate impact as he gives the ball away in midfield to allow Gallipoli to score the equaliser, then leaps to crack home a header to put us back in front a minute later. Then he gets injured. With three subs on at that point I've no option but to let Depardieu limp around up front. Still, we're still 2-1 up with 94 minutes on the clock, so it's a better result than we exp... crap. 94 minutes on the clock and Gallipoli swing in the sort of cross that Sue Pollard has been cleaning up all season, only he's in the medical room, allowing Alessandro Carrozza to head home an late equalising away goal. Latina 2-2 GallipoliCat Stevens - 9 Clemente - 61Depardieu - 62 Carrozza - 90+PLAYOFFS - SECOND LEGFive days and one hour later I'm looking at a miraculous turn of events as my gimpy collection of wounded fuckwits are somehow holding on to a 2-1 lead in the game, 4-3 on aggregate, thanks to goals from Cat Stevens and Gennaro Marasco, either side of an equaliser from Pietro Clemente. Amusingly, fullback Marco Candrina comes back from injury for the game but is reinjured after just ten minutes and the home side also boot Steve Jobs up in the air, injuring our only remaining first-team centre back. We're sat back with a deep defensive line that won't close down, back arrows everywhere trying to hold on to what we've got when the AI decides to do this : just the old 35 yarder in off the post. As you do. From there I'm not sure if I should shit or bust. I could go looking for another away goal, which would probably be enough to put me through, but possible ship another goal, or I could sit on this and go to extra time. With the second (and in some places third) string team I have out, I decide to sit on the 2-2 and see what happens, my only instruction is to start throwing in the heavy tackles and see if I can kick my way to an extra-period advantage. We hold on to 90 minutes without too many problems and.... that's it. The game ends, the players walk off and apparently I'm out. After the game I'm told that a draw sends the higher seeded team through. That would be Gallipoli and not us. :moop: Vittoria beat Gallipoli in the final.
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Post by Sonic on Jun 14, 2009 8:47:48 GMT
:cab: I bet that long shot maestro had a stat of something along the lines of 2 too. Excellent work on making the play-offs. Not the way I was expecting that to end, and right up there with all the other play-off situations all of us have encountered over the years of FM/CM. It wouldn't be the same without it :moop: There were some excellent results in that bunch of updates, Vittoria's being one, and some dodgy ones too. Injuries, the other kicker that you get from FM/CM. Looking forward to seeing how this goes next season. KUTGW :thumb:
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Post by Moo on Jun 14, 2009 13:56:35 GMT
OUch that has to hurt. Although it shouldnt be a surprise to you as you read all the playoff info in the league info screen, right?
WAT?
KUTGW! :thumb:
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Post by Mr Bismarck's Electric Donkey on Jun 16, 2009 11:10:39 GMT
Pre-SeasonI'm looking through the list of teams that I can warm up against and see a non-league team in Italy called "Angri" which seems appropriate after the way last season ended, so I pick them. So that made me feel better. We then drop an 0-3 to Serie B Bari, before bouncing back to win 3-2 against Serie B Cremonese and then finish with 3-0 and 4-0 wins over non-league sides to get our confidence up ahead of the season. Serie C CupHe'll be mentioned in my squad listing below, but my hot new Hungarian Striker Lulu plays really well through pre-season and looks like a great foil for Cat Stevens, right up until the point where she dislocates her shoulder the day before the season starts. :humb: Then just for giggles, fellow newcomer Queen Victoria and old salt Gerard Depardieu are also both injured, leaving me with only three fit forwards. You can see how short we are up front, because we only win our first cup game 4-1. Cat Stevens opens the scoring against Andria Bat, before Gennaro Marasco makes it two before half time. In the second new signing Richard E Grant breaks free from midfielder for the third and then Enea Parma is off the bench to go on a 60 yard dribble to fire home for four. The Bats win a late, late penalty for their goal. Our second cup game goes the way of Stevens and Marasco again, for a 2-0 win, before we get punched in the face away from home against Manfredonia - the home team pound us 4-2 despite Cat Stevens grabbing a brace. Serie COnly one game in the league this month, at home to Real Marcianase who gave us some trouble last year, but we control the game from whistle to whistle, running out 2-0 winners thanks to Richard E Grant and Cat Stevens. I'm most pleased by our defence, which is a bit rag tag and bobtail now thanks to injuries, featuring our third string DC and an MR in the centreback roles, as they stop Marcianase from getting a shot on target. The fact that a wounded attack has put in ten goals in four games is nice too.
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Post by Moo on Jun 16, 2009 14:19:47 GMT
You've been very fortunate. I shall smite thee for it.
KUTGW! :thumb:
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