Post by elth on Jun 30, 2006 8:24:31 GMT
As I think I'm allergic to it.
1. Active leagues: Serbenegro (full); Belgium, Croatia, Greece, Israel, Ruska, Mehico, Turkey (basic)
2. Normal DB size
3. All British Virgin Islands players loaded
4. Guaranteed fake players
5. Players signed by Scout Recommendation, if we play against them or if they show up in a Player Search only
6. Staff signed by Job Centre only
7. Formation: 4-4-2 or some variation thereof
8. Ummm that's it. I think. Perhaps.
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Is it just me or do the shite you get lumbered with in FM games get worse every time you play it? If not, I think they should as that would make the game harder for experienced players. I might suggest that to SpInG. Anyhoo.
CSK Pivara announce shock signing of unheard of Chilean manager Spoonfed By Aliens. By Aliens is unheard of in his own country, his new country, any and all other countries on the planet and most of the ones off it too. He's reported as being delighted to join the club, and relieved that the local Chairman speaks no English and therefore doesn't really how silly he sounds. The fans hope he has what he takes and the media comment he'll have to learn fast. The fans and media aren't gonna know what hit 'em...
7.5m Din is available for transfers and with just 228k pw taken of a "hefty" 625k wage budget, there's plenty of cash to splash and that's assuming the natural charm of the place doesn't attract hordes and hordes of potential players. And by natural charm I think we all know what I'm talking about though perhaps that incentive will entice more Boony's and less Ronaldinhos. Still, I don't discriminate against fatties and alcos.
Backroom staffers are, indeed, utter bunk. Wahay! My physios are about 80% of what I'd like and half of what I'd like so I place a job advert begging someone, anyone, anywhere to come and save me from the Mongol barbarians at the gates. A similar SOS goes out in regards to scouts, coaches, assistant managers and the other positions too. D'ya reckon Serbengro is in Eastern Europe or Southern Europe? I'm betting Southern so I send my scout off to Eastern to hunt for gimps. I like gimps. The one full time player I have at the club also likes gimps.
With that, it's squad summary time.
Ow! That hurt my hand, you bastard!
Hair Rock, a 32 y/o Serb who loves to charge at strikers is the early favourite for the #1 jersey, his 6'1" frame and lightning decision making ability more than making up for his horrible distribution. I hope. Heavenly Monkey, an eccentric 35 y/o Serb who also is a coach at the club looks to be the main backup. Radiation Therapy (26, Serbian) is there for emergencies, Go Away is listed not for the crime of being Vietnamese (wtf?) but because he's possibly the worst 27 y/o goalkeeper in history. 18 year old Not Pavement keeps net for the kids.
Mmmm....ankles...
The one fulltime player I have is a defender, he's called Innocent? Pah!, he's a DC, and he's rubbish. Typical. Nosferatu is a pacey DLC who is also rubbish. The news gets better with I Can't Believe who is a very, very competant (you might even say good!) left back. No Time (19, DC, rubbish), Wants to be Loved (21, DLC, rubbish), Goodnight (33, DC, rubbish), Brother In-Law (26, Sw/DC, rubbish) and Walking Dead (37, DC, utter rubbish) make me realise that there's very little chance we're going to keep a single clean sheet this season. Young Divine Divinity however, makes me ponder promoting him from the youth to the senior squad as he's got at least as much talent as the other idiots. Boys and Girls is a promising young left back, Stinkpig is a not-very promising young rightback and It's Not Butter will need right back training but will start by default as everyone else is bunk. Adults Only, a Bahraini right back (wtf???) is listed for the crime of being, well, horrible.
My defence stinks.
Stop kicking the ball over me
Awww, Katie looks to be a useful 27y/o DMC, Godless is good mentally but poor technically for an MC, therefore needs training but is young at 22 so can improve. Got Religion can play DMC and MRC so will be a useful rotation player but isn't great for a 30 y/o veteran. Buy A Vowel is bunk and listed, Buddha's Lovechild is another versatile but mediocre DM/MRC (since when is that a common combination?) and Hilarity is a young DMC with a great future.
Starship Trooper (AMC, 21) looks to be the best of the horde of midfielders I have, Gonzalez (AML, 20) will start on the left wing making for a youthful midfield. The Island, Honest Men and Awful are various shades of awful and will spend some time in the reserves, I feel. Tell Me Lies, Middle of Nowhere, No Regrets and Magic Man make up the midfield, they're all kids who likely wont feature often.
New Depths has little ability at 27 but will get some time in attack as he can play AM/FC, and can finish a tiny bit.
My midfield also stinks. Yes. Yes. Oh yay.
But I always shoot from here
Miss You Love and Crowds of People are the best of the strikers, they're both cack mind. Tea & Sympathy will back them up, Toy Soldier is horrible garbage and meets Mr. Transfer List. Kebab Shop is over all the way from Lebanon and therefore gets to play with the kids just because I feel sorry for him.
These players are awful. Awful, awful, awful.
1. Active leagues: Serbenegro (full); Belgium, Croatia, Greece, Israel, Ruska, Mehico, Turkey (basic)
2. Normal DB size
3. All British Virgin Islands players loaded
4. Guaranteed fake players
5. Players signed by Scout Recommendation, if we play against them or if they show up in a Player Search only
6. Staff signed by Job Centre only
7. Formation: 4-4-2 or some variation thereof
8. Ummm that's it. I think. Perhaps.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Is it just me or do the shite you get lumbered with in FM games get worse every time you play it? If not, I think they should as that would make the game harder for experienced players. I might suggest that to SpInG. Anyhoo.
CSK Pivara announce shock signing of unheard of Chilean manager Spoonfed By Aliens. By Aliens is unheard of in his own country, his new country, any and all other countries on the planet and most of the ones off it too. He's reported as being delighted to join the club, and relieved that the local Chairman speaks no English and therefore doesn't really how silly he sounds. The fans hope he has what he takes and the media comment he'll have to learn fast. The fans and media aren't gonna know what hit 'em...
7.5m Din is available for transfers and with just 228k pw taken of a "hefty" 625k wage budget, there's plenty of cash to splash and that's assuming the natural charm of the place doesn't attract hordes and hordes of potential players. And by natural charm I think we all know what I'm talking about though perhaps that incentive will entice more Boony's and less Ronaldinhos. Still, I don't discriminate against fatties and alcos.
Backroom staffers are, indeed, utter bunk. Wahay! My physios are about 80% of what I'd like and half of what I'd like so I place a job advert begging someone, anyone, anywhere to come and save me from the Mongol barbarians at the gates. A similar SOS goes out in regards to scouts, coaches, assistant managers and the other positions too. D'ya reckon Serbengro is in Eastern Europe or Southern Europe? I'm betting Southern so I send my scout off to Eastern to hunt for gimps. I like gimps. The one full time player I have at the club also likes gimps.
With that, it's squad summary time.
Ow! That hurt my hand, you bastard!
Hair Rock, a 32 y/o Serb who loves to charge at strikers is the early favourite for the #1 jersey, his 6'1" frame and lightning decision making ability more than making up for his horrible distribution. I hope. Heavenly Monkey, an eccentric 35 y/o Serb who also is a coach at the club looks to be the main backup. Radiation Therapy (26, Serbian) is there for emergencies, Go Away is listed not for the crime of being Vietnamese (wtf?) but because he's possibly the worst 27 y/o goalkeeper in history. 18 year old Not Pavement keeps net for the kids.
Mmmm....ankles...
The one fulltime player I have is a defender, he's called Innocent? Pah!, he's a DC, and he's rubbish. Typical. Nosferatu is a pacey DLC who is also rubbish. The news gets better with I Can't Believe who is a very, very competant (you might even say good!) left back. No Time (19, DC, rubbish), Wants to be Loved (21, DLC, rubbish), Goodnight (33, DC, rubbish), Brother In-Law (26, Sw/DC, rubbish) and Walking Dead (37, DC, utter rubbish) make me realise that there's very little chance we're going to keep a single clean sheet this season. Young Divine Divinity however, makes me ponder promoting him from the youth to the senior squad as he's got at least as much talent as the other idiots. Boys and Girls is a promising young left back, Stinkpig is a not-very promising young rightback and It's Not Butter will need right back training but will start by default as everyone else is bunk. Adults Only, a Bahraini right back (wtf???) is listed for the crime of being, well, horrible.
My defence stinks.
Stop kicking the ball over me
Awww, Katie looks to be a useful 27y/o DMC, Godless is good mentally but poor technically for an MC, therefore needs training but is young at 22 so can improve. Got Religion can play DMC and MRC so will be a useful rotation player but isn't great for a 30 y/o veteran. Buy A Vowel is bunk and listed, Buddha's Lovechild is another versatile but mediocre DM/MRC (since when is that a common combination?) and Hilarity is a young DMC with a great future.
Starship Trooper (AMC, 21) looks to be the best of the horde of midfielders I have, Gonzalez (AML, 20) will start on the left wing making for a youthful midfield. The Island, Honest Men and Awful are various shades of awful and will spend some time in the reserves, I feel. Tell Me Lies, Middle of Nowhere, No Regrets and Magic Man make up the midfield, they're all kids who likely wont feature often.
New Depths has little ability at 27 but will get some time in attack as he can play AM/FC, and can finish a tiny bit.
My midfield also stinks. Yes. Yes. Oh yay.
But I always shoot from here
Miss You Love and Crowds of People are the best of the strikers, they're both cack mind. Tea & Sympathy will back them up, Toy Soldier is horrible garbage and meets Mr. Transfer List. Kebab Shop is over all the way from Lebanon and therefore gets to play with the kids just because I feel sorry for him.
These players are awful. Awful, awful, awful.