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Post by Sonic on Jun 30, 2006 0:20:09 GMT
Croatia, French(Ligue 2 Orange and Above), Germany(2 and above), Russia, Ukraine, S&G. I’m using all but the search/find button; I’m using a Large database.=============================================================== Damn work. I’m supposed to be on holiday, but a humanity problem(my best friend throwing up in the local) has cast me adrift in some hell hole. Where am I again? Oh, it’s an S&M club. What the hell am I doing here? “Have you got a room?” Who said that? “I did. I want one.” Fine, but I’m leaving and you’re on your own. “Ha, that’s what you think.” I left not trusting myself to answer that one. I’m sure you can think of some. It was then that I encountered my next problem, where was I. It turned out I was also mad, as that wasn’t an S&M club, it was some sort of official boarder crossing hut to get into Serbia and Montenegro. I wandered the country for a while, somehow not getting shot, and also not getting arrested, or disappearing. I ended up at a national brewery that I forgot the name of and was there so often that they told me that I should get a job in the local area. They found out that I was a football fan and told me of a janitor’s role going at the local football club. I they told me it paid surprisingly well, came with accommodation, and I got to watch free football matches as long as I was employed by the club. Who was I to say no. No one even noticed I’d started. I wasn’t complaining, as I was getting paid. My only problem was that my accommodation is also the closet I work from Looks like I’m going to have to aim for kit manager, as the dressing room is a much better place to sleep in. The first thing I noticed about the club was that there was a flurry of paper work being thrown around. You see, I hate paperwork. It generally means that I have a lot more work to do, which interrupts my beer time. I finally get the gist of what’s going on as it seems, I’m not the only new man at the club; the club has hired a new Head Coach; and he wants everyone on fulltime contracts. Including the backroom staff. Unfortunately that doesn’t include me. He does offer to give me a new set of brushes. Thanks. It turns out that this new manager is a youngster, and is also an Australian. He likes beer, so we drink together when he isn’t playing with his football team. He also plays around with his backroom staff, firing Ass Man Brandy Is A Good Idea for what turns out to be a better one, 39yr French Sergeant Major. He also brings in two other coaches, Juggles Lizards and Would You Like A Martini?, all who are French, with non of them able to speak anything other than French. I think they are up to something, and that’s not just GK, Set Piece and Tactics training. I was told something about stars and I pointed to the sky. They shook their heads and said all but 1 are 3 with the last being a 4 and that was GKing. They is crazy speaking. I’m looking forward to upcoming games, which are excuses to drink more of the local national brewery’s specialty, and hurl abuse at my bosses play, things, slurrily. It should be fun. Apparently he’s going to play a 4141 but I think he’s going throw tinny’s at the team and yellow drunkedly at them. I might help him if I decide that I need more entertainment. Or I feel sick. There are 6 friendlies and I’m not sure I will go to all, but there are 38 games also to see. Actually, I will go to all, as that means less work to do, but probably more to do after the game. That’s the time I look for a hidey hole to sleep off my imbibed substances But that’s for another day. Right now, I’m off to bed. But before I do, I’m told the manager fired another staff member, Might Go Blind, for £1k, after he didn’t want to mutually terminate.
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Post by coffers on Jun 30, 2006 7:31:20 GMT
If you keep drinking that stuff you'll go mad. Oh hang on.......... :thumb:
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Post by Moo on Jun 30, 2006 8:28:01 GMT
Mental. Crack on, sir! :thumb:
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Post by floplexter on Jun 30, 2006 8:58:51 GMT
Mutually terminate, slurrily.
Dickensian. :thumb:
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Post by Moo on Jun 30, 2006 9:12:51 GMT
She took me into the parlour, I thought for a cup of Earl Grey, but Lady Patricia surprised me with her forwardness.
"Gosh!", said I, "What are you doing?" "I wanted to show you my ladygarden. Pretty isn't it?" "Well, my lady, it certainly is well maintained, but I'm afraid I simply can not assist you in whatever frivolity you require from me." "Why ever not, Mr Dalliance?" "Well, whlst on a recent jaunt to coutnries overseas, I was taken to a darkened market in Istanbul, where I was subjected to an apparent delicacy which was very spicy in it's taste and greasy in it's texture. Your ladygarden reminds me of that trip and the badly arranged kebab I saw there. I'm afraid with putting chilli sauce on your snatch, you ain't getting any lickings from me." "Well, sir, you have offended me. I shall call on my butler to bring in my horse."
Exeunt.
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Post by floplexter on Jun 30, 2006 10:01:35 GMT
Mutually terminate, surreally. That sounds more like Henry Fielding. :thumb:
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Post by Moo on Jun 30, 2006 10:23:19 GMT
I'll bow to your superior judgement on that one. I just wanted to get an image of a horse licking a fanny into everyone's heed.
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Post by floplexter on Jun 30, 2006 12:02:37 GMT
Oh, I thought she was just leaving.
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Post by Sonic on Jul 3, 2006 6:43:00 GMT
:cab: Damn, now I've a new level of zannyness to try and aspire to reach. That's afte I discount Meej, and Hornet and Stu, and oh. Where's my coat :moop:
I did have another update ready, but on re-reading htis, found that it needs touching up. Or Moo's horse.
Tomorrow, plus a squad list, and even games are a possibility too :checkit:
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Post by Moo on Jul 3, 2006 8:58:44 GMT
Then get on with it, upside down poof!
:thumb:
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Post by Sonic on Jul 3, 2006 23:59:26 GMT
“Wake Up You Lazy Bum, it’s the afternoon and you’ve not cleaned up my bed!” Bloody hell, it’s my first day and already I’m finding out that the kit manager is a nazi, and a slave driver. He told me not to forget that, except when we’re watching the games and drinking beer, both of which go hand in hand understandably I was also told. It turned out that all he wanted was for me to see if he wasn’t hallucinating and that he had all the shirts in place. After that, he told me to get another beer. Since it was only 10 o’clock in the morning, I decided not to join him. I told him I’d look him up at lunch time. He said, ok. It turned out that wasn’t a bad preparation for the friendlies that were coming up, at least the first one. The rest needed their own preparation, depending if we were at home or not. Here was the kit managers synapses of the friendlies, though when you read them, you must add a slur to them. The first was an interesting game, but a win. A yawn-a-thon. An undeserved draw against CSK, as their goal was offside. Another yawn-a-thon, except that a penalty settled the game in CSK’s favour. Sour tasting. :moop: 2 goals from one on target and injuries. He finished with, just think what the league games are going to be like! I’m thinking my janitor’s closet was going to be great viewing this season if that was his opinion. I remember things slightly different, mostly that the manager has something, but I’ve yet to see what it is as I can’t remember. Much like my sleeping has been of late. Or was that drinking. I do remember some traveling involved. Sajkas – a team almost as obscure as CSK, except CSK seem to have a national rep(?). We started brightly, away from home to boot, giving us not long to settle into our first beer(at least at the game) in the 10th minute. It came from A Lot Of Jelly. A Lot Of Trajectory was another I then noticed, as the ref unfairly saw his fantastic last ditch tackle as a last man tackle in the 24th minute, just outside the CSK area. Oh, we’re now even, a freekick, Going Cuckoo the GK who let it in. I went to the bar. Wait, make that the esky. It wasn’t far, and we started yelling at the ref, and birds, and other things that took our fancy, like the clouds, half time, the ref again, and substitutions. Oh, somethings happened other than us getting belted behind the goal. It’s a disaster, no not the game, I’ve dropped my beer. Oh, Releasing A Virus in the 72nd minute the scorer, taking advantage of a brilliant assist from the Sajkas defence. That’s how it ended, except from the taunts we gave the Sajkas GK, who had a mare, rating 2, but still only let in 2 goals. We decided to offer him a beer. Don’t be silly Dubnica – A foreign team! At Home! 62 fans! Oh, that’s not that great I’ve been told. It took me all of 5 minutes to decide this borong. I don’t know why I even waited this long. I went and got my pillow from the closet. It was pink and fluffy. Thanks Kit Manager, thanks red sock. I was woken up at the end of the match. Central Defender Burning Lazarus was MoM Cracovia – A Polish side, traveling to S&G. They must like the punishment. So must the 69 fans. It seems the manager set the team to give them possession, but in such a way as they didn’t look like being threatened to be broken down, goalwise that is. It would have been good if CSK didn’t look so toothless in attack, and boy did we give it too them. No one understood us. The second half was a much more exciting affair. CSK got a shot on target. Surprisingly, it went in. Doing Jenny was another name we started to celebrate, so I went down to the dugout and offered the manager a beer. See, once you start this offering beer around, others start getting into the act, and so somehow I’m hosting this roaring party on the side line. Even the 4th official and the linesman on this side was involved. Hey, what’s that whistle? A goal in the 89th minute. We saw the replay, and yep, the linesman’s pissed. It’s offside. And that ends the game. Oh, no, we took our beer and went home. There was only one problem with htat :moop: Dubocica – A non league team, and we’re traveling. I wasn’t expecting much, and that’s what I got. That was until the 80th minute. Finally we could yell abuse at someone other than just throw empty’s at nothing inparticular. Sassy Vicky was pushed! You don’t push girls, or even mangirls. Penalty. This should be fun. It was, though their GK was worse than CSK’s taker, as he couldn’t stop a trickling ball from going into the back of the net, A Lot Of Trajectory the successful taker. Nice. That was the highlight. Yuk, Yogurt! was MoM. He’s a loanee. Backa – This was a good game, up until the 8th minute. Doing Jenny making a name for himself again. Oh, what’s this? GLITFOS! What’s that? OH. Wait, what’s the defense doing? What’s the linesman doing? Oh. Is there something for that when the second one goes in like that but for the second shot of the game? No, well that’s what happened. How can a slow attacker out run an easily quicker defender? Seriously, how they won this game I don’t know. On the trip back, I tried to empty the esky, which is not an easy thing. I stayed in the Janitor’s closet the whole next day. Kom – The last friendly, and another away game. I’m hoping to see a better match than the last one. I’m not confident, considering the lethality in front of game. Hey, they’re passing the ball around nicely, dominating possession. Oh hang on, that’s not ment to happen. Why have my defenders run away when they aren’t ment to? Oh. :moop: The second goal wasn’t even on target, but came from a freekick given away in the 85th minute, was deflected off the wall onto the post and into the net. Surely an own goal as it wasn’t on target? No? :cab: So, I can’t make out anything from this game, or ultimately any of them. I think this season could give me a drinking habit. I better ring the hospital just to let them know I could become a regular. Hey, they have better beds there…:cab:
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Post by Sonic on Jul 3, 2006 23:59:50 GMT
Now that I’ve seen some action, I’ve seen a few of the players play, and could do a squad report or other. Actually, I found it in the bin.
Butterfingers : Il n'y a aucun talent vraiment qui regarde n'importe quel bien tous, mais j'ai 3 de ces derniers, sur qui a le coucou 36 allant, un autre qui a 33 que c'est mon Sandpit et un certain jeune qui a me donner un coup de pied environ quelque part ayez voir encore. Il est chinois apparemment, sucent qui ? qui juste a son insigne de S&G et est énuméré.
Gremlins : C'est une position qui est intéressante de telle manière que je me demande si s'ils se tiendront ou humpty. Assurément le tenir le premier rôle de la défense est 21yr DLC ne brûlant jamais Lazarre, avec 27yr D/WBL vous esprit regardant le meilleur du groupe. 24yr DLC avec 2 pieds de beaucoup de trajectoire regarde le prochain meilleur C.C avec l'emprunteur Yuk, yaourt ! un C.C 21yr de mb de Hajduck Rodic. La tache de dos de droite est donnée pour tremper le médecin, un 23yr D/WBR qui peut aborder comme un fou. Il y a également A Lubby(22 très gros, DLC), [/Filly[/b](22, SW/DC b]Naughty), Wonderful(Chinese, 18, D/WBR) et A Baby(18 de Mary le Poppin encore plus mauvais, C.C) et très près de A Mutiny(19, C.C) aussi. Il y a également de 32yr DC/DM aux pieds gauche devenant fous qui peut jouer dans la zone centrale ; et, 34yr D/WBR/MRL aucuns moyens conduisant l'aveugle qui peut jouer en bas du côté gauche du lancement qui est utile jusqu'à ce que vous prenniez dans le compte combien de midfielders dégrossis gauches là sont.
Battelords : C'est un positon, yadayadaya, vous savent le repos. Les incontestables tiennent le premier rôle du côté sont le jour nuageux très ensoleillé, un 25yr AMC aux pieds gauche qui peut passer et ruisseler. J'ai également le Sally(23 faisant grand, MC), beaucoup de Jelly(28, AMRC), heureux car Larry(31, AML), le sac s'agitant d'Otters(20, AMLC), Pavlova(28 de fonte, DM), Vicky(31 Impertinent, DM/MRC), Nematod Joy(29, AM/FC). Si je m'emploie courais juste au-dessus d'un Ant(17, D'un MRC), le loane me conduisant Mad(19, MLC) et Whoa, Minging Rabbit!(Chinese, 19, FC/AMLC), je suis désespéré. Il y a également 3 joueurs dehors sur le prêt : Là où est mon Pudding(31, DM/MRC), où est mon Glasses(22, AMRC) et Sailor(23 vilain, AMC) tous qui ressemblent à partir la fin de la saison, ou avant s'itcan aident. Ou d'autres qui pourraient aussi. Le directeur de kit a offert, qui pourrait apporter améliorer en avant ma commodité.
Singe : Il y a des couples des types pour cette position, mais comme les 3 autres positions, yada-yada-ya-etal. Là libère A Virus(32, rue), faisant Merry(26, rue), faisant Jenny(20, rue), reposés sur A Cat(28, AM/FC) que tout pourrait faire un travail, bien que faire la bourrique ait le meilleur finissage de loin. Si je commence à voir à plat sur le Back(21, la rue) avec plus de type joie de zone centrale de Nematod de joueurs et le Whoa d'un âne, lapin de Minging ! utilisée, la chose de I l'équipe est dans l'ennui.
Upon looking through this list, I decide that I’m better off not involved. Oh wait, what’s this on the back? It looks French. Hmm, Sergeant Major believes that CSK Pivara will have no real chance of avoiding relegation from the Prva Sprska Liga unless the squad is heavily strengthened. I turn it upside down. Nope, still can’t understand it.
The next day, I’m clocking off, and I find pinned to my door, Attendez-vous à un peu à de travail quand le 2ème Rnd de la tasse de Girly a lieu après le premier jeu, quand le ciment (b) vient à la ville. I’m asking for a jackhammer, the pitch needs addressing.
I kept sweeping, sleeping and trying to ignore everyone. I get the feeling they aren’t going to let me.
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Post by Sonic on Jul 4, 2006 0:19:50 GMT
I finally found someone to tranflate the messages above. How the manager could read it I don't know, as he only knows English.
Butterfingers: There is no talent really that looks any good at all, but I’ve got 3 of these, on who’s 36 Going Cuckoo, another who’s 33 This Is My Sandpit and some youngster who’s kicking about somewhere I’ve yet to see. He’s Chinese apparently, Suck Who? who has just got his S&G badge and is listed.
Gremlins: This is a position that is interesting in such a way that I’m wondering if whether they will stand or humpty. Undoubtedly the star of the defense is 21yr DLC Burning Lazarus, with 27yr D/WBL Never You Mind looking the best of the bunch. 24yr DLC with 2 feet A Lot Of Trajectory looks the next best DC along with loanee Yuk, Yogurt! a 21yr DC from Hajduck Rodic MB. The right back spot is given to Douse The Medic, a 23yr D/WBR who can tackle like a maniac. There are also A Very Fat Lubby(22, DLC), [/b]Naughty Filly[/b](22, SW/DC), Wonderful(Chinese, 18, D/WBR) and the even worse Mary Poppin’s A Baby(18, DC) and Very Close To A Mutiny(19, DC) too. There are also 32yr left footed DC/DM Going Crazy who can play in the midfield; and, 34yr D/WBR/MRL No Means Driving Blind who can play down the left side of the pitch which is useful until you take into count how many left sided midfielders there are.
Battelords: This is a positon, yadayadaya, you know the rest. The undoubted star of the side is Very Sunny Cloudy Day, a 25yr left footed AMC who can pass and dribble. I also have the tall Doing Sally(23, MC), A Lot Of Jelly(28, AMRC), Happy As Larry(31, AML), Flapping Bag Of Otters(20, AMLC), Melting Pavlova(28, DM), Sassy Vicky(31, DM/MRC), Nematod Joy(29, AM/FC). If I use I Just Ran Over An Ant(17, MRC), loane Driving Me Mad(19, MLC) and Whoa, Minging Rabbit!(Chinese, 19, FC/AMLC), I’m desperate. There are also 3 players out on loan: Where’s My Pudding(31, DM/MRC), Where’s My Glasses(22, AMRC) and Naughty Sailor(23, AMC) all who look like leaving at the end of the season, or before if itcan help. Or others who could too. The kit manager did volunteer, which could bring forward upgrading my accommodation.
Monkey’s: There are a couple of guys for this position, but like the other 3 positions, yada-yada-ya-etal. There is Releasing A Virus(32, ST), Making Merry(26, ST), Doing Jenny(20, St), Sat On A Cat(28, AM/FC) who all could do a job, though Doing Jenny has the best finishing by far. If I start seeing Flat On A Donkey’s Back(21, St) along with more midfield type players Nematod Joy and Whoa, Minging Rabbit! used, I thing the team is in trouble. and Whoa, Minging Rabbit!(Chinese, 19, FC/AMLC), I’m desperate. There are also 3 players out on loan: Where’s My Pudding(31, DM/MRC), Where’s My Glasses(22, AMRC) and Naughty Sailor(23, AMC) all who look like leaving at the end of the season, or before if itcan help. Or others who could too. The kit manager did volunteer, which could bring forward upgrading my accommodation.
Monkey’s: There are a couple of guys for this position, but like the other 3 positions, yada-yada-ya-etal. There is Releasing A Virus(32, ST), Making Merry(26, ST), Doing Jenny(20, St), Sat On A Cat(28, AM/FC) who all could do a job, though Doing Jenny has the best finishing by far. If I start seeing Flat On A Donkey’s Back(21, St) along with more midfield type players Nematod Joy and Whoa, Minging Rabbit! used, I thing the team is in trouble.
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Post by Moo on Jul 4, 2006 8:36:11 GMT
I particularly like the way you repeat yourself in this thread. it's great!
KUTGW! :thumb:
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Post by floplexter on Jul 4, 2006 9:06:24 GMT
Flapping Bag of Otters. What is French for yada yada? KUTBW! (Bilingual)
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Post by Sonic on Jul 6, 2006 0:21:50 GMT
I particularly like the way you repeat yourself in this thread. it's great! KUTGW! I did? Where? Oh, I see now :cab: I couldn't work out which approach to take, so included both. Pops, that's what it gave me. Though on further looking into it, I also came up with: Youth Against Drug Abuse Yiddish American Digital Archive Young Asian Designers Award Yet Another Disclaimer Added Yet Another Damned Acronym.
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Post by Sonic on Jul 6, 2006 2:38:50 GMT
“Last Drinks Everyone, get ‘em know while we’re offering.” We loaded the table, that is the manager, the kit manager(who I seem to magically understand) and someone else I can’t remember.
The conversation went something like this…
“Show, do’s ya shinnk we’ve a shance to-to-tomorrow?” “Na, use are going to belt them, and then throw it away.” “Hey, I wasn’t talking about the football” “Oh. Ins that case, yesh.” “Exshellent.”
We were trashed. I have no idea what were talking about, but one thing did come true, whatever non football related we thought we had a chance to do did happen. I think it was throwing up. If I could just remember were that occurred, and why my closet is now yellow. Oh. Yay.
======================================
Bang, Bang, bang. “Wake up sleepy head. I don’t know how you do it, but you did.” That was the kit manager. “I’ve been told to tell you to clean out the dugout, the home sides.” “Why? What Happened?” “The Head Coach chucked a volcano and spewed. There’s stuff everywhere. Good Luck” “Gee, thanks.”I grab another 5 minutes.
It turned out I had missed the first game of the season, and that CSK had started fantastically against, who was it, yeah that’s it, Jedinstvo. It seems the away defense found our previous nights efforts as one of them tried to use Doing Sally as a prop and held onto his shirt. He tried pointing to it, but it didn’t work. Happy As Larry gave CSK the lead in the 4th minute. CSK took possession, something they did for much of the match, and did bugger all in front of goal. The 22nd minute changed that when a nice move down the left, saw Very Sunny Cloudy Day cut down to the goal line and give a great ball to Doing Jenny who blasted in. Queue CSK doing the passing and territory, and then the 34th minute occurred. It always was going to, but this one was GLITFOS special, except in the 34th minute. A corner knocked in by Jedinstvo like they were a top class side. Yes, that happens apparently. The game went back to the way CSK was playing. The next major occurrence occurred in the second half, and this is the bit that annoyed me, as it woke me up. Sonic Youth spewed. It seemed he was still feeling delicate and in his anger, his delicate stomach heaved and he sprayed his wroth for all and sundry to see. Uh-oh. OH, the goal, it was a penalty given away in the 57th minute; a forward free of the defense was held back by Yuk, Yogourt! who only received a yellow. Releasing A Virus tried very hard to silence the jeers behind the goal, and also wide of it, but he only really did it twice. I’m not happy, as I didn’t sign up for this. Get with it, stop giving away 2 goal leads.
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Post by Sonic on Jul 6, 2006 2:40:21 GMT
I decided to steer clear of the amber liquid, but it only lasted until after the next game. This game was also at home, so by the end of the half, I’m starting to get jittery, especially as the team is tonking the other one. Oh yeah, they are called Cement, and they are a non league side, and this game is the Kup Srbije i Crne Gore Qual. Rnd (Ser) Qual. 2. Ala, Girly Kup. It took until the 45th minute for the match to finally reward CSK as they saw a player sent off for Cement(Releasing A Virus held back with only the GK to beat), and Very Sunny Cloudy Day knock in the resultant freekick. It took until the end of the next half for the game to be finally killed, as we sealed Cement’s fate, Releasing A Virus the scorer. Substitute Releasing A Virus picked up MoM after coming on in the 41st minute.
Cement, get your cement at the next Girly Kup game. Great, except I don’t need any. Oh, it’s a team. It’s the 3rd Rnd Qualifying Rnd. When does this Kup for Girls begin? They must like their qualifiers.
I had one beer, and then another, and then another, and then some curry, and then another, beer, not curry. Then Youth came over and oh man, is that the kit manager. Hey, he really must be cold if he’s wearing all the shirts.
“He Kit Man, where’s your kit bag?” “Don’t ask.” “I just did” “Oh, don’t ask again” “Ok, where is it? And why are you wearing all those shirts” “I just cleaned them.” “You did? Then why are you wearing them?” “I couldn’t very well carry them all the way from the drive through car cleaner now could I” “Drive through car cleaner?” “Yep, and that’s were the bad is?” He looked so crestfallen about losing the bag, we gave him a beer. Unfortunately for him, he forgot to take the shirts off and he had to clean then again the next day. We also found out that he uses this method for taking showers too.
This could explain the first half of the CSK’s game against Srem. It was a stinking hot 30ºC. Remember the shirt cleaning technique? Well maybe that had something to do with it, as even though they were playing ok, they were distracted in front of goal. I was later told that was normal. The game was not worth reporting on until the last 5 minutes + injury time of the second half. The 85th minute saw a red given to a Srem player. Changes to CSK then saw surprisingly, goal action. Sat On A Cat grabbed a 90th minute goal, and late into injury time, the 94th minute, Doing Jenny scored too. Good, I didn’t have anything to clean up after this match, except the rubbish from the 404 fans that turned up.
Hearyea, hearyee, all at he club must bow down and worship A Lot Of Jelly for making the team of the week, for all of one second. The rest of you must be crap as you didn’t rate mention in the player of the round or goal of the round. That includes you A Lot Of Jelly for the other two you didn’t mention in. Suck Who? is also to be noted for his taking of the S&G nationality too. That got noticed, the newletter I’m talking about, the one I tried to start up for these sort of things, which unfortunately didn’t go down well with the club. The fans were another matter. They found they made great napkins.
After this match both wingers came down injured. Training didn’t look as hard after that. I even thought about joining in, but quickly rejected that idea as just plain silly. I grabbed a 6 pack instead and watched them train instead. That was until I was told to sweep out the change rooms. It seems the Kit Man has not been cleaning up after himself that well. What am I, the cleaner boy? Next thing you’ll know I’ll be the defensive tackle or whatever position he was playing helmet ball as. Or I could become a deaf midfielder. I wouldn’t be that out of place right now.
Another Girly Kup, and another non league team. This one was called something or other, but contained the letters D-o-r-o-c-o-l. Once again the first half was frustrating, and the second half looked much the same, as CSK played while D-o-r-o-c-o-l scrambled. They wouldn’t take my order of eggs, easy over light with pepper and bacon which was annoying. Aaaahhh, pppfff, penalty! What for? I dunno. What! Oh, yeah, you, ah, shoved, yeah that’s it, you shoved him(points to Releasing A Virus). Needless to say only CSK were happy as A Lot Of Trajectory slotted home the 60th minute penalty. We chanted the refs name, Tanovic, though he wasn’t pleased with the other response upon having his eye sight tested from the D-o-r-o-c-o-l fans and wives. Releasing A Virus finished off the game ten minutes later and we got blastered. Flapping Bag Of Otters was MoM, creating well on the wing. Oh, and this was a hammering.
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Post by Sonic on Jul 6, 2006 2:41:04 GMT
Hey, what have we here? Oh. I ran to the chairman and said, I never had relations with that woman. He told me to relax, and he said that he did. The disturbing thing was that that woman was not, and I was proved right, but so was the Chairman. This is the point were I say that Club has signed 14yr DM Lucky Rooster. He is a bit scrawny and lazy for my tastes. Hold on. The Chairman bloody keeps winking at me as he goes past, the bostord. I’m getting nervous. Stupid Chairman, he’s now infected the team. I tell him so during the next game, when CSK traveled to OFK. He told me that I’ve got to be kidding if he thought he was serious. We winced soon after that as Doing Jenny he was thinking about instead of his free shot on goal hit straight at the GK. That’s from our best finisher who has a 17 for it. That’s the type of game this was. The pleasing thing while watching this game, the Chairman started confiding(I’m important like that ) was that even though the team didn’t score, they played really well, and the manager actually went for the win throwing on even more attacking players. He paused, much that we have to use. I asked the Chairman if he was disappointed to see his run of 2’s in games finish, and he was, as it meant no goals scored. He went on to say that at least it wasn’t against. Fullback Douse The Medic was MoM with his 7 key passes from 28/36 made. Burning Lazarus is called up to the S&G U21’s side. Back home after the away game, the games are coming quickly, and this one sees CSK play at the moment, 3rd placed Cuckaricki. If we win, there is a chance that CSK could take their spot. Not that I’m taking notice of these things or anything. It seems that the team from the last game gets to redeem themselves, all but the too knackered Sat On The Cat who was benched for Nematoad Joy. It proved an inspired joy as we chanted our favourite parasites name. The ref didn’t particularly like our throwing beer cans on to the field to give to him either. Party pooper. The goal came down the left with Flapping Bag Of Otters linking up with Very Sunny Cloudy Day who slotted in Doing Jenny behind the defense. He cut it back and Nematoad Joy arrived late at the far post to knock it in on 14. I started noticing this tall player on the pitch, though it wasn’t hard to spot him considering the yellow shirt he was wearing as he caused much havock. I wouldn’t mind him in my team. I found out later a bid was placed for him. Anyway, the game was entertaining, and after we got bored with chanting CSK and clapping, and whistling their whide efforts, we got to clap something much better. A goal for CSK. It came in the 65th minute for a penalty. I missed it, but it was a push on Flapping Bag Of Otters. Must have been a critic. A Lot Of Trajectory did the converting and that was me feeling a lot more comfortable. He wait, that’s not how they were playing before the goal. You dill, that’s how they have been playing since the break when they took off the hacked Nematoad Joy. Half time sub Sassy Vicky was then hacked out of the game in the 61st minute and a reshuffle was seen in midfield. Very Sunny Cloudy Day who had been running CSK’s game found Doing Jenny. He sent sub Making Merry behind the defense and CSK were in nosebleed region regards goals scored as they broke that magic 2 number. See it is possible. This occurred in the 78th minute. Thankfully they got htat third as a minute later a freekick was curled in with a left foot on the right into the near posts corner. If CSK hadn’t have had that buffer, I wouldn’t have been taunting The Cuck’s as blatantly Very Sunny Cloudy Day picked up MoM with a majestic second half, rating 10. A great game to show our highest audience yet, 516 fans turning up. The Board are hoping this excelling performance by the players will be a spring board. Are the Board going to be adding a pool to the training facilities, much that there is. I was joined on the side lines during the next training time by both Sassy Vicky(upto 2 weeks with bruised ribs) and Nematoad Joy(utpo a month with a twisted ankle). They were up, and then down. They better fix that if they want to keep sitting in the stands with me. The monthly update is posted on the notice board of the club, and I find out that the Board is encouraged by my performance. They like the way I sweep, the clockwise patterns are particularly pleasing but they said that leaving half the job behind caused too much sneezing, even though it did look pretty. Oh, and they said the same about Youth, except for the dust bit. They also said the club only made a loss of £9k. Youse are all crappy, in that only Very Sunny Cloudy Day has any sort of class and has set a bench mark for youse all to try and git too. He’s won the 2nd place in the Tosser, I mean Player of the Round and also made the team of the Round as well. Youse all need to learn how to score as none of youse has made the list of best goal scorers. Rubbish the lot of you, and that includes Very Sunny Cloudy Day for the one list he didn’t make. Get with it you lot. The club once again egged me, and the fans found this newsletter better for whipping up spills. Next to my newsletter was something about Gore, and CSK and Kups of Girls(ok, they were pictures) and Sevojno. Home was also mentioned too. Must be a safe house or something. Safehouse? I must becoming localized, or is that loonalised? I’m not sure. I’m not sure how I’m going to travel this season, so when we went to Radnicki, I saw this as an opportunity to see how I would go, and the team. I was 1 of 1168 people who saw this game. Man it was hot, and I’m glad that they don’t worry about you bringing eskys to games. I needed it this game. It was dire. CSK gave possession to Radnicki but saw that they didn’t threaten too much their goal, which wasn’t Radnicki approach. The chants were getting lame, and we were getting strange looks. Come-on, if you chant, “If you want a draw, kick the ball” what do you expect. I guess we were lucky they didn’t have much rotten fruit left. The CSK fans had wasted this in the first half when a great chance was missed by Doing Jenny who decided to pass to an offside Releasing A Virus instead of having a crack himself. He must have been warned. The second half came to ahead, and Youth made some changes, including tactics wise. I didn’t ask for a wake up call. Oh, we’ve scored, Making Merry in the 73rd minute, finishing off a No Means Driving Blind cross who was given the space by Very Sunny Cloudy Day. Youth made more changes and the game went back to before my wake up call. The bus ride back was fun, as we got to have a piss-up with the team on the bus. Fun times that was.
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Post by Sonic on Jul 6, 2006 2:45:36 GMT
Ok, I had a table at this point, but it seems I didn't bring it in. You'll have to wait until tomorrow to see it now.
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Post by floplexter on Jul 6, 2006 10:22:02 GMT
Making Merry, Doing Jenny, A Lot of Trajectory, Releasing a Virus..... I see where this is going. What was going through your head when you nicked? Jeeze.
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Post by Moo on Jul 6, 2006 10:27:32 GMT
Images of Jenna Jameson, I think.
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Post by coffers on Jul 7, 2006 22:34:11 GMT
I think he's pissed or something, if he isn't I am. :thumb:
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Post by Sonic on Jul 9, 2006 22:44:29 GMT
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Post by Sonic on Jul 9, 2006 22:47:12 GMT
Making Merry, Doing Jenny, A Lot of Trajectory, Releasing a Virus..... I see where this is going. What was going through your head when you nicked? Jeeze. I'm not sure, but I did start this soon after a good friend went over seas for a month and a half. I was trying to adapt their names into the nicks, though some did come out not quite how I expected.
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